I'm glad I have this livejournal here, even if I hardly keep it updated. Because for those times when my whirling thoughts reach that awful speed that's just too much to handle.. I can let them all out here. You know I once heard that a study was conducted to see what all the major geniuses in philosophy, science, etc. had in common... and the one thing they found was a place of solitude, existing solely for the purpose of thinking. People like Ben Franklin and Leonardo Da Vinci each had a certain location, be it a treehouse or perhaps a spot out in the wilderness, where they retreated when the world just got too much. And perhaps when left to ponder like that, they came up with their outrageous life-altering ideas. It makes sense if you think about it. All those great minds gave themselves time to specifically sort their thoughts and let their minds wander... almost like a dream.. but while fully conscious. Genius... literally :) Anyway... I've finally struck peace within my nonstop lifestyle. It didn't come easily, and in fact wasn't even my choice... but nevertheless, rest and peace has finally arrived. After 8 weeks of constant doctors, medical tests, drugs, and sleepless nights... I'm finally feeling somewhat stable again... and from here on out, I'm going to appreciate life. Because in a weird way... getting horribly sick has allowed me to take it slow, and realize I need to appreciate the little things in life. Like naps. Lord knows I am going to be so much more pleasant with time for naps and resting and ADEQUATE AMOUNTS OF SLEEP!!! Like... more than 3 hours a night!!! I know, my life is so shockingly busy... everyone practically dies when they hear I'm lucky to get 3 hours of sleep a night. But now, I'm turning over a new leaf. And I am SO much more joyful already, just out of anticipation for time I have always wished to have. Time to lay out on the beach, and drive to get frozen yogurt, and call my sister, and build friendships I should have been strengthening all year... time to leisurely do homework, read pleasure books on the side, and maybe even download a new song or two... providing the dean of admissions doesn't track down my ass. I swear to God she's the most intimidating woman I've ever seen in my life. Which is all completely meaningless information.... but the fact that I have the time to divulge this meaningless information is what's creating this instantaneous happiness. I hope it's contagious.
Onto more recent events, I've had such a wonderful past few days. I officially quit my job last week, and although I will no longer have the funds for the luxuries I would like, I am so relieved to know the rest of this year is mine for the taking. Provided I don't overexert myself, I plan to live up this last month like so many freshmen were able to do. I'm bound to make this year memorable and exciting and everything I thought it would be... Can you tell I'm excited or what??? So on Friday I was finally able to go out with Nathan to this apartment party for Dave. Preeti and Nathan and I all met in my room and kinda partied and got ready for a little bit before heading towards the apartments where a bunch of Hemet people were all congregating... Hemet people will always stick together!!! It was nice to have an eventful night that didn't consist of sleeping, taking medication, and watching tv or something that allowed me to "rest." We didn't stay long, and it was easily something that I could handle... so I still have to be smart about what I do... but I had a wonderful evening. Then Saturday was spent driving to see the amazing Hemet Chamber Singers perform at Fullerton College. We barely made it on time, but all the awful traffic was worth it. Their blend was just outstanding, and watching all their hard work come together made me proud to call myself a veteran!!! They have such a closeknit group this year... it honestly seems like the drama was minimal... and their bonds of friendship were even evident on stage. Nathan and I even followed them to Disneyland for the awards where I got to hang with my mommy and sissy and all the crowds? haha. It was awfully crowded, but like I said... all worth it. They definitely deserved that Gold, and I am so proud of all of them. Today I was able to see my family again at my Grandma's, and I immensely enjoyed myself. I'd go into detail about this weekend, but I believe it's obvious that I could go on forever!!!!
Final thoughts... the future is as bright as ever... I miss my family, and am awaiting a wonderful summer with my sister by the pool!!!.. I finally have clarity of mind and appreciate life so much.... And I finally know the meaning of optimism.